首发偶发空缺 (临时空缺)-第46章

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‘Krystal　bullied　our　daughter　Lexie；’　said　Samantha；　‘so　we’ve　seen　a　different　side　of　her　to　the　one　I’m　sure　she　shows　you。’

‘Look；　we　all　know　Krystal’s　had　a　rough　deal；’　said　Miles；　‘nobody’s　denying　that。　It’s　the　drug…addled　mother　I’ve　got　an　issue　with。’

‘As　a　matter　of　fact；　she’s　doing　very　well　on　the　Bellchapel　programme　at　the　moment。’

‘But　with　her　history；’　said　Miles；　‘it　isn’t　rocket　science；　is　it；　to　guess　that　she’ll　relapse？’

‘If　you　apply　that　rule　across　the　board；　you　ought　not　to　have　a　driving　licence；　because　with　your　history　you’re　bound　to　drink　and　drive　again。’

Miles　was　temporarily　baffled；　but　Samantha　said　coldly；　‘I　think　that’s　a　rather　different　thing。’

‘Do　you？’　said　Kay。　‘It’s　the　same　principle。’

‘Yes；　well；　principles　are　sometimes　the　problem；　if　you　ask　me；’　said　Miles。　‘Often　what’s　needed　is　a　bit　of　mon　sense。’

‘Which　is　the　name　people　usually　give　to　their　prejudices；’　rejoined　Kay。

‘According　to　Nietzsche；’　said　a　sharp　new　voice；　making　them　all　jump；　‘philosophy　is　the　biography　of　the　philosopher。’

A　miniature　Samantha　stood　at　the　door　into　the　hall；　a　busty　girl　of　around　sixteen　in　tight　jeans　and　a　T…shirt；　she　was　eating　a　handful　of　grapes　and　looking　rather　pleased　with　herself。

‘Everyone　meet　Lexie；’　said　Miles　proudly。　‘Thank　you　for　that；　genius。’

‘You’re　wele；’　said　Lexie　pertly；　and　she　swept　off　upstairs。

A　heavy　silence　sank　over　the　table。　Without　really　knowing　why；　Samantha；　Miles　and　Kay　all　glanced　towards　Mary；　who　looked　as　though　she　might　be　on　the　verge　of　tears。

‘Coffee；’　said　Samantha；　lurching　to　her　feet。　Mary　disappeared　into　the　bathroom。

‘Let’s　go　and　sit　through；’　said　Miles；　conscious　that　the　atmosphere　was　somewhat　charged；　but　confident　that　he　could；　with　a　few　jokes　and　his　habitual　bonhomie；　steer　everyone　back　into　charity　with　each　other。　‘Bring　your　glasses。’

His　inner　certainties　had　been　no　more　rearranged　by　Kay’s　arguments　than　a　breeze　can　move　a　boulder；　yet　his　feeling　towards　her　was　not　unkind；　but　rather　pitying。　He　was　the　least　intoxicated　by　the　constant　refilling　of　glasses；　but　on　reaching　the　sitting　room　he　realized　how　very　full　his　bladder　was。

‘Whack　on　some　music；　Gav；　and　I’ll　go　and　get　those　choccies。’

But　Gavin　made　no　move　towards　the　vertical　stacks　of　CDs　in　their　sleek　Perspex　stands。　He　seemed　to　be　waiting　for　Kay　to　start　on　him。　Sure　enough；　as　soon　as　Miles　had　vanished　from　sight；　Kay　said；　‘Well；　thank　you　very　much；　Gav。　Thanks　for　all　the　support。’

Gavin　had　drunk　even　more　greedily　than　Kay　throughout　dinner；　enjoying　his　own　private　celebration　that　he　had　not；　after　all；　been　offered　up　as　a　sacrifice　to　Samantha’s　gladiatorial　bullying。　He　faced　Kay　squarely；　full　of　a　courage　born　not　only　of　wine　but　because　he　had　been　treated　for　an　hour　as　somebody　important；　knowledgeable　and　supportive；　by　Mary。

‘You　seemed　to　be　doing　OK　on　your　own；’　he　said。

Indeed；　the　little　he　had　permitted　himself　to　hear　of　Kay　and　Miles’　argument　had　given　him　a　pronounced　sense　of　déjà　vu；　if　he　had　not　had　Mary　to　distract　him；　he　might　have　fancied　himself　back　on　that　famous　evening；　in　the　identical　dining　room；　when　Lisa　had　told　Miles　that　he　epitomized　all　that　was　wrong　with　society；　and　Miles　had　laughed　in　her　face；　and　Lisa　had　lost　her　temper　and　refused　to　stay　for　coffee。　It　was　not　very　long　after；　that　Lisa　had　admitted　that　she　was　sleeping　with　an　associate　partner　at　her　firm　and　advised　Gavin　to　get　tested　for　chlamydia。

‘I　don’t　know　any　of　these　people；’　said　Kay；　‘and　you　haven’t　done　one　damn　thing　to　make　it　any　easier　for　me；　have　you？’

‘What　did　you　want　me　to　do？’　asked　Gavin。　He　was　wonderfully　calm；　insulated　by　the　imminent　returns　of　the　Mollisons　and　Mary；　and　by　the　copious　amounts　of　Chianti　he　had　consumed。　‘I　didn’t　want　an　argument　about　the　Fields。　I　don’t　give　a　monkey’s　about　the　Fields。　Plus；’　he　added；　‘it’s　a　touchy　subject　around　Mary；　Barry　was　fighting　on　the　council　to　keep　the　Fields　part　of　Pagford。’

‘Well；　then；　why　couldn’t　you　have　told　me　–　given　me　a　hint？’

He　laughed；　exactly　as　Miles　had　laughed　at　her。　Before　she　could　retort；　the　others　returned　like　the　Magi　bearing　gifts：　Samantha　carrying　a　tray　of　cups；　followed　by　Mary　holding　the　cafetière；　and　Miles；　with　Kay’s　chocolates。　Kay　saw　the　flamboyant　gold　ribbon　on　the　box　and　remembered　how　optimistic　she　had　been　about　tonight　when　she　had　bought　them。　She　turned　her　face　away；　trying　to　hide　her　anger；　frantic　with　the　desire　to　shout　at　Gavin；　and　also　with　a　sudden；　shocking　urge　to　cry。

‘It’s　been　so　nice；’　she　heard　Mary　say；　in　a　thick　voice　that　suggested　she；　too；　might　have　been　crying；　‘but　I　won’t　stay　for　coffee；　I　don’t　want　to　be　late　back；　Declan’s　a　bit　…　a　bit　unsettled　at　the　moment。　Thanks　so　much；　Sam；　Miles；　it’s　been　good　to；　you　know　…　well；　get　out　for　a　bit。’

‘I’ll　walk　you　up　the—’　Miles　began；　but　Gavin　was　talking　firmly　over　him。

‘You　stay　here；　Miles；　I’ll　see　Mary　back。　I’ll　walk　you　up　the　road；　Mary。　It’ll　only　take　five　minutes。　It’s　dark　up　the　top　there。’

Kay　was　barely　breathing；　all　her　being　was　concentrated　in　loathing　of　placent　Miles；　tarty　Samantha　and　fragile；　drooping　Mary；　but　most　of　all　of　Gavin　himself。

‘Oh；　yes；’　she　heard　herself　saying；　as　everybody　seemed　to　look　towards　her　for　permission；　‘yep；　you　see　Mary　home；　Gav。’

She　heard　the　front　door　close　and　Gavin　had　gone。　Miles　was　pouring　Kay’s　coffee。　She　watched　the　stream　of　hot　black　liquid　fall；　and　felt　suddenly；　painfully　alive　to　what　she　had　risked　in　overthrowing　her　life　for　the　man　walking　away　into　the　night　with　another　woman。

VIII
Colin　Wall　saw　Gavin　and　Mary　pass　under　his　study　window。　He　recognized　Mary’s　silhouette　at　once；　but　had　to　squint　to　identify　the　stringy　man　at　her　side；　before　they　moved　out　of　the　aureole　cast　by　the　street　light。　Crouching；　half…raised　out　of　his　puter　chair；　Colin　gaped　after　the　figures　as　they　disappeared　into　the　darkness。

He　was　shocked　to　his　core；　having　taken　it　for　granted　that　Mary　was　in　a　kind　of　purdah；　that　she　was　receiving　only　women　in　the　sanctuary　of　her　own　home；　among　them　Tessa；　who　was　still　visiting　every　other　day。　Never　had　it　occurred　to　him　that　Mary　might　be　socializing　after　dark；　least　of　all　with　a　single　man。　He　felt　personally　betrayed；　as　though　Mary；　on　some　spiritual　level；　was　cuckolding　him。

Had　Mary　permitted　Gavin　to　see　Barry’s　body？　Was　Gavin　spending　evenings　sitting　in　Barry’s　favourite　seat　by　the　fire？　Were　Gavin　and　Mary　…　could　they　possibly　be　…？　Such　things　happened；　after　all；　every　day。　Perhaps　…　perhaps　even　before　Barry’s　death　…？

Colin　was　perennially　appalled　by　the　threadbare　state　of　other　people’s　morals。　He　tried　to　insulate　himself　against　shocks　by　pushing　himself　to　imagine　the　worst：　by　conjuring　awful　visions　of　depravity　and　betrayal；　rather　than　waiting　for　the　truth　to　rip　like　a　shell　through　his　innocent　delusions。　Life；　for　Colin；　was　one　long　brace　against　pain　and　disappointment；　and　everybody　apart　from　his　wife　was　an　enemy　until　they　had　proven　otherwise。

He　was　half　inclined　to　rush　downstairs　to　tell　Tessa　what　he　had　just　seen；　because　she　might　be　able　to　give　him　an　innocuous　explanation　of　Mary’s　night…time　stroll；　and　to　reassure　him　that　his　best　friend’s　widow　had　been；　and　was　still；　faithful　to　her　husband。　Noheless；　he　resisted　the　urge；　because　he　was　angry　with　Tessa。

Why　was　she　showing　such　a　determined　lack　of　interest　in　his　forthing　candidacy　for　the　council？　Did　she　not　realize　how　tight　a　stranglehold　his　anxiety　had　gained　over　him　ever　since　he　had　sent　in　his　application　form？　Even　though　he　had　expected　to　feel　this　way；　the　pain　was　not　diminished　by　anticipation；　any　more　than　being　hit　by　a　train　would　be　less　devastating　for　seeing　it　approaching　down　the　track；　Colin　merely　suffered　twice：　in　the　expectation　and　in　its　realization。

His　nightmarish　new　fantasies　swirled　around　the　Mollisons　and　the　ways　in　which　they　were　likely　to　attack　him。　Counter…arguments；　explanations　and　extenuations　ran　constantly　through　his　mind。　He　saw　himself　already　besieged；　fighting　for　his　reputation。　The　edge　of　paranoia　always　apparent　in　Colin’s　dealings　with　the　world　was　being　more　pronounced；　and　meanwhile；　Tessa　was　pretending　to　be　oblivious；　doing　absolutely　nothing　to　help　alleviate　the　dreadful；　crushing　strain。

He　knew　that　she　did　not　think　he　ought　to　be　standing。　Perhaps　she　too　was　terrified　that　Howard　Mollison　would　slit　open　the　bulging　gut　of　their　past；　and　spill　its　ghastly　secrets　for　all　the　Pagford　vultures　to　pick　over。

Colin　had　already　made　a　few　telephone　calls　to　those　whom　Barry　had　counted　on　for　support。　He　had　been　surprised　and　heartened　that　not　one　of　them　had　challenged　his　credentials　or　interrogated　him　on　the　issues。　Without　exception；　they　had　expressed　their　profound　sorrow　at　the　loss　of　Barry　and　their　intense　dislike　of　Howard　Mollison；　or　‘tha’　great　smug　basturd’；　as　o